Dating Should Be Like Shopping

O.K. so I was inspired by the forum, this isn’t a rant, like the previous Files, but an extended thought and explanation. I’m sure there are those who will disagree with me: this is my opinion, not that of all girls everywhere.

In my opinion, dating should be like shopping. Not the I-have-something-particular-in-mind-and-if-I-can’t-find-it
-I’ll-settle-for-what-I-can-get-shopping, but casual I-had-nothing-better-to-do-on-a-Saturday shopping.

All good I-had-nothing-better-to-do-on-a-Saturday shopping starts when you walk by a window and see something that makes you think oooo…that’s cute. I think a different thought goes through guys minds, but since I don’t know what that is, I’ll let them fill it into the oooo…that’s cute space above. This is known as window-shopping, and at this point you either make one of two decisions. 1) Keep walking or 2) Enter the store. Let’s say you decide to enter. Since you aren’t looking for anything in particular, all the clothes in the store are going to get a look, even though whatever was in the window made you come in.

This is where the actual shopping comes in. I’m not saying that I view this as shopping for a husband…this is a casual shopping experience…no pressure to buy; clothes don’t get thrown around the dressing room in anger because they aren’t perfect…its FUN!!

So while wandering around the store you “check out” the clothes. Some are cute, some are alright, and some…well I won’t go there since it’s an analogy. The “picking up” of clothes off the rack falls into the introduction/one or two dates category. I have no problem going on a date with a guy I hardly know, while I am picky, there are a few here and there that have made the first date cut. It’s a good way to get to know someone, and it in now way requires marriage. Yes having this view on dating has lead to some weird situations, but it usually leads to a good story or laugh later. Plus first dates don’t require seconds, and if you don’t like the guy you don’t have to go out with him again. “Picking up” clothes can however lead to trying them on, or what everyone else would call dating. Yes you’re looking for the perfect fit with what you’ve tried on, but since it’s just a I-had-nothing-better-to-do-on-a-Saturday shopping trip, there’s still NO PRESSURE. Yes there’s more involved at this point. If you like it enough to try it on, you could have gotten prematurely attached to it and somewhat let down if it doesn’t work. There are the things that look better on the hanger than on your body (hotties that treat the person they’re in a relationship with like crap) and things that look better on your body than on hanger…you know those things you thought “why not try it on, what do I have to lose.” (the geeks that treat girls like a princess even if they aren’t the hottest guy you know.)

Now, every trip to the dressing room doesn’t mean whatever you tried on is going to be bought, or that it does have to be bought. This means, if you are in a relationship (more than one or two dates here) with a person, this isn’t necessarily going to lead to marriage, or as the Capt’n says “checkmate, ding.” Anything taken to the dressing room is either going to be bought or put back on the rack for someone else, just like any relationship is going to end up at “checkmate, ding” or breaking up. And this is where my analogy ends, because in relationships unlike in shopping, unless you’re Mormon, you can’t walk away with more than one item.

Just like anything else with God, He can’t help you unless you’re willing. He can’t use you’re gifts if you don’t provide them, He can’t save anyone unless they are willing, He can’t get you married if you aren’t willing to take the first step and go on a date. You could meet you’re best friend (that’s not how it happened for me if you read my previous File), you could have the worst experience of you’re life, but you’re going to learn. If you date a guy or girl and it doesn’t work, you can raise you’re expectations…maybe you don’t know how you’re suppose to be treated, no matter what you were told growing up, and how will you ever find out if you are being treated right if there’s nothing to compare it to. All I can say is keep an open mind, and take some of the pressure off yourself!…And the most important thing…HAVE FUN!! It wasn’t suppose to be this hard.