Another Letter

Dear State of FL,

I demand that you release my roommate at once. I have powerful connections in the FL Republican party and you’ll be sorry. I’m talking two degrees of separation with the Governor. Heck, I’ll even sweeten the deal. We could arrange a trade…say Artie for the plans to the Suppository of Doom? And by plans, I don’t mean “technical schematics for a microwave in Chinese”.

However, if you are unwilling to come to the bargaining table, I’ll be forced to resort to less diplomatic solutions. Right now, I’ve got a platoon of PMS’ing, mangry women on standby ready to extract him. They’ve been trained by the best redneck militia this side of Montana. So what’s it going to be? We can do this the hard way or the easy way.

I need an answer by sundown because I don’t know how much longer I can keep these women at bay…I’m running out of Ben and Jerry’s.

Thanks!

PS – While you’re at it, you might want to check out that gas station just north of Tallahassee that had regular gas for $3.48 a gallon this morning.

OSLD: Some gee golly don’t you know table hockey, eh.

Filmwise: Guess the movie scene with invisible people.

Mr. Friggles.

“The clerk fought back and hit the suspect with a Skoal log”

I caught you a delicious paper bass.

Pinball.

Jogger learns the hard way why drinking beer found on the side of the road is not healthy.