How Not To Be An Obnoxious Tourist

So seeing as how I actually live in Oxford, I am officially allowed to be annoyed by tourists. This is something that because of the area in the United States that we live in, we don’t have to deal with. In the UK however, it’s very annoying. All the little tour groups come en mass, and take up large amounts of space. So my first piece of advice is DON’T DO A TOUR GROUP. There are plenty of ways to find out about a place without coming with a guide. In the UK there are large buses that drive you around the city and tell you all about it. There are even walking tours that you can take, and in Oxford they even take you into some of the colleges. So with that out of the way, here’s the rest

2. Do Not stand in the middle of the street-people do live wherever you are visiting, and sometimes they are in a hurry. By standing in the middle of the street, you block their passage and usually get them really TO’d, which in most places outside of the south will cause you to be accosted with a series of not such nice words.

3. Do Not carry around a large map. They make small pocket maps, but if you’re going to consult it, I would advise doing it at a meal or before you leave your hotel etc., because it immediately labels you as a tourist, which makes you vulnerable to pickpockets. On this same note, girls, outside of the south, Do Not put your purse on the back of your chair, always put it between your feet when you sit down.

4. Do Not be overly loud. American accents really stick out when no one else around you has one. There are some Americans who are really loud, this usually happens to be teenagers and college aged students, but this also labels you as a tourist, and subject to the things laid out above. It also aggravates some of the more reserved cultures such as the British (who can get rowdy actually) as opposed to say the Italians.

Some things that make you stick out when visiting a foreign country.
1. T-shirts: especially for girls
2. Brand name tennis shoes: especially white ones, and if you aren’t working out.
3. Backpacks: even in a town like Oxford that is built around a university, backpacks stick out.
4. Complaining about the food: you’re in a foreign country, its part of the experience, suck it up and eat it…for most people it won’t be very long till you can eat your fried chicken again. Be adventurous, who knows…you might like it.

Some advice for the UK
1. You’re going to walk…A LOT
2. Don’t give the peace sign…if you don’t do it the right way, you’re giving them the bird.
3. Bacon is not crispy
4. Most stores close at 6
5. If you go to a real restaurant, as opposed to a pub where you have to order at the bar, the waiter or waitress is going to take FOREVER. This can get really annoying. They don’t hound you, and they don’t even seem overly excited about getting their money. Don’t be in a hurry if you’re going to a restaurant.
6. It’s a bill, not a check
7. Biscuits are cookies…they have no idea what our biscuits are.
8. While they don’t seem overly nice, most people will actually help you out if you need to know something, and be nice about it.
9. McDonalds, Burger King, and KFC don’t have the same foods, and don’t taste the same.
10. You rarely get ice, and there is no such thing as a free refill
11. Ask for tap water, or you’ll have to pay for it.

That’s it for now. Enjoy your dry and warm weather, and know that while I may be pale when I get back…you all are going to get skin cancer.